Posts for 'Tips' Category

Divorce is a tough thing for anyone to go through – it can be very hard on a person emotionally and physically. This is just as true for children. They will also need proper help during this difficult time.

Eventually you and your spouse will have to sit down together and make arrangements that will be suitable for you and your children. This will be much easier and less painful than having to go to court and have them decide this for you.

Don’t keep the divorce a secret from the children. You need to tell them about your decision to get divorced and what it will mean to them. Let them know that it was a mutual decision and that you both did your best to avoid a divorce.Make them understand that you and your spouse will not be getting back with each other and there is nothing they can do to make this change.

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Both parents should be there to talk to the child and they can’t get angry. Whatever differences they have they must put aside for the good of their child.

This is not about the parents anymore since the decision has been made to split up; it’s all about the kids. The parents have to let the child know that it has nothing to do with them.

That they did not cause it and that they are still very much loved by each parent. The children will have questions and depending on the age of the children.

The questions will vary. You have to be prepared to be honest and speak with one voice on everything that they ask. Blame does not matter at this moment.

You children are losing the full time access to one of their parents and that can be devastating to them. Their lives are going to change and they are scared.

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YS Mediation a firm of skilled divorce attorneys educates Manhattan couples, who find themselves separating and heading for divorce. Choosing a divorce mediator is personal because the legal professional mediating your divorce will help both you and your estranged spouse decide about the most important things in your lives: children, home, money, financial security, and division of personal effects.

A New York divorce mediator helps couples avoid the high cost of hiring individual divorce lawyers and keeps their disagreements out of court and confidential. Consider the following when shopping for a divorce mediator in Manhattan:

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In part two of this series, the New York divorce mediation attorneys at YS Mediation Center offer a tip for settling a divorce through mediation without unnecessary added pressure. Compromise is key when reaching an amicable agreement. Tip #2: Avoid Ultimatums and Deadlines

Every divorce case is unique and can involve issues that others may not some of which may be non-negotiable. When a situation becomes heated, avoid using ultimatums or deadlines, as doing so essentially stops the negotiating process and becomes detrimental to both parties.

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Each year,the parents of about 1 million children will separate or divorce. Divorce creates a crisis for children, but Joseph Nowinski, author of .

The Divorced Child, says they can emerge from the experience as “more resilient, self-confident individuals.

”He offers tips for parents to help the transition go more smoothly: Don't explain the “why.” Nowinski cites three reasons:

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Yearly more than 1 million children experience the divorce of their parents. The process and trauma these children experience will normally begin long before there is an actual divorce.

It will begin with parental disagreements, anger and continue to worsen throughout the divorce process and can often last for many years after the divorce is final.

You can’t take your child’s discomfort away but there are things you can do that will lessen the long lasting effects your divorce will have.

Here's How:
Utilize Age Appropriate Therapy.It is important to have a third party who can be objective and whose only concern is listening to and putting at ease, the feelings of the child.

A child will feel more comfortable expressing anger or sadness to a third party such as a therapist.

Put Their Feelings First.Stay focused on your children’s needs in spite of your anger, grief and discomfort in the divorce process.

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Getting divorced? Here are some true stories of divorce from the book "You Can Keep the Damn China!' And 824 Other Great Tips on Dealing With Divorce" (Hundreds of Heads Books, www.hundredsofheads.com, $13.95), straight from people who've lived it:

I still have a relationship with my ex-husband. Our boys live with him, and right now we wouldn't have it any other way. He's a wonderful father, and I feel very lucky he has taken that responsibility very seriously. They adore him, and that helps me live via daily phone calls and e-mails to them.

And when I get to see them, I see a reflection of him in them. We talk on a daily basis about our children's lives and how to help or complement them. Together we support the good and bad days for our children. And sometimes, my ex listens when a new "friend" in my life doesn't work out as I had hoped, and he is very supportive without being critical or judgmental about my decisions. I feel lucky.

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Ontario is making it faster and less combative to get a divorce.  Attorney General Chris Bentley has announced long-promised changes to family law, saying they should make divorce proceedings faster, less expensive and less combative.

The changes will redistribute the province’s current resources. Ontarians going through a divorce will now have more access to information and legal advice early on.  They will also have a better chance to enrol the help of a mediator, arbitrator or collaborative lawyer.

Vets, agricultural engineers and teachers are all less likely to divorce than dancers, bartenders and nurses, according to research which claims your job is key to a happy marriage. Those who work in the caring professions or who have jobs that are extrovert and stressful are more likely to split from their partner.

Dancers, choreographers, massage therapists and bartenders have around a 40 per cent chance of experiencing a relationship breakdown. Also at high risk are nurses, psychiatrists and those who help the elderly and disabled.

However, optometrists, dentists and clergymen carry a 2 to 7 per cent chance of family breakdown. Agricultural engineers are most faithful. The trend has been highlighted in a paper that correlates occupations with divorce and separation rates, to be published in the Journal of Police and Criminal Psychology.

FSo, she hired a company to do market research in Canada and the United States and found a large market that was not being served. "One of the things I learned [at university] was that if you can find a niche that has not been met yet, where people are screaming about a need that they haven't been able to articulate, you've got a gold mine."

Fairway Divorce Solutions was founded in 2006. It helps divorcing parents come to an agreement on separation issues, including finances and care for children, by going through a step-by-step process with the help of facilitators and experts. It is designed to avoid conflict. After being reviewed by independent legal counsel, the resulting agreements are registered with the courts.

Among the things that make Fairway different, she says, is that it recognizes the importance of protecting children, preserves a family's finances and uses experts to help. It also requires that both parents going through Fairway must come to an agreement.

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