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Thousands of children annually face divorce

Posted in : Divorce and Children

(added 1 days ago)

Thousands of children in the 10.5-million Czech Republic are annually affected by their parents' divorce and they live either with one parent, mostly their mother, or in shared care of both parents afterwards, according to data of the Czech Statistical Office (CSU).

Almost three-fifths of married couples who seek divorce have underage children. In the past two years the parents' divorce afflicted some 50,200 children in the Czech Republic. Last year, 28,100 couples divorced in the country, which was 2700 fewer than in 2011.

Though the divorce rate has been decreasing year-on-year, a total of 46 percent of marriages split in 2011, while in 2010 it was 50 percent. A total of 56.3 percent of divorced couples had underage children.

Last year, the parents' divorce afflicted some 23,700 boys and girls. Czech married couples divorce after 12.9 years on average. Two-fifths of couples divorce within ten years after the wedding.

In 2010, 30,800 divorces were registered in the Czech Republic, which was 1600 more than in 2009, while underage children lived in 57.3 percent of these families, the CSU said. People most frequently divorce two to five years after the marriage.

In 2007, when 31,000 couples divorced, some 27,500 children lost their complete family. The average length of marriage was 12.3 years then. Two-fifths of the divorced couples had no underage children.

The family concept has been changing in the Czech Republic, according to experts, and a number of children are living with only one parent, usually the mother. Czech courts most often place underage children in the custody of women.

Experts point out that the economic situation also changes after the divorce. Children living with one parent only who receives child maintenance have worse financial conditions than in a complete family.

However, some children keep living with both parents alternatively after the divorce. The number of babies born out of wedlock has been rising in the Czech Republic as well year-on-year.  Last year, almost 42 percent of babies were born out of wedlock, while five years ago it was one third. However, not all of these children live with one parent (a single mother) only.

Statistical data show that Czechs are rather losing interest in marriage and many couple are living together and raising their children though they never wed.

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Divorcee Matrimony

Posted in : Effects of Divorce

(added 2 days ago)

Talaakshuda is the world's reliable and most promising Divorced Matrimonial site. This provides the service through online portals for the Divorced Remarriage, second marriage, Divorcee/Divorced, Widow/Widower across the world. We facilitate you with the best matchmaking services for the people who got divorced, this enables the brides and grooms across the world to communicate one another who are awaiting for there Second Marriage. Our site provides you many facilities like chat, email, view phone and instant messaging which helps you to select the best bride or groom for your Second Marriage. In order to access these facilities you need to be registered for Talaakshuda.com, which is free.

Divorcee Matrimony

For registering into this site you need to be above 18 according to the rules of Indian Government. To create your Divorcee Matrimony profile you need to fill the online application provided by us and later this will be sent to our administration department for verification and if the information provided by you meets our ethical standard's, we provide you the username and password to your email id by which you can access the account. Each and every profile is verified and screened manually for avoiding the fake profiles. By registering into Talaakshuda.com you have many advantages like: we provide you with unlimited contacts depending on your interests, you van send unlimited express interests and mails to whom you are interested at.

We provide you the contacts from all the communities available in India which help you to select the best one for your successful Indian Second Marriage. For providing the best contacts according to your interests you need to fill your partner profile option and also specify your hobbies, interests, your photograph, contact details, phone no into the appropriate fields of the application form. Your can protect your contact details by enabling the privacy settings in your profile. We facilitate you to edit your account settings whenever it is required and these updating will be sent again to our administration department for screening and later it is updated in your profile.

You can contact to the other members with the help of Express Interest, Chat, Phone, Email and Personal message options and you are restricted to upload only ten photos for one profile which should be in either .gif or .jpg format and it's size should be less than 1MB. You are also facilitated to provide your profile voice and profile video for ensuring about you in a better way. This site provides you the best platform for the Divorced Dating.

For free users of this site we provide only with the basic facilities such as: we provide you with profile match alerts, we provide privacy and security for your profile and we provide you a facility to express your interests. The benefits for the paid members are: they are facilitated to contact unlimited members, facilitated to chat with unlimited number of members; they can view the mobile number and can express the interests. You can pay the money through DD, Direct banking, credit cards, online banking etc… for becoming a paid user. Start a new life by joining Talaakshuda.com which provides you the best Matrimonial Services in India, which enhances you to lead the remaining life pleasantly and happily after your Second Marriage.

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Divorce and Alimony Formula

Posted in : Others

(added 8 days ago)

In divorce, a common question is, "what is the alimony formula".  Well, there really is no set alimony formula for divorce.  This is in complete contrast to child support, which is decided based upon a specific formula in each state.  Alimony is based on factors and those factors are decided through divorce negotiation or by a divorce judge. But, there is no alimony formula available to your divorce attorney or you to determine in advance what alimony will be paid in your case.

What does a divorce court look at to determine alimony?  Those issues do vary by state.  But, there are also many alimony factors that are common from state to state.  So, although there is no specific alimony formula for you to rely on, there are alimony factors that you can look at to help you determine what the alimony might be in your case.

In divorce, some of the alimony factors that a judge might look at include the following.  First is the length of your marriage.  If the parties have been married for one year, the court's attitude towards a request for alimony will be very different than if the parties have been married for twenty years.  Because the length of marriage varies so much in all divorces, it is not possible to plug this factor into an alimony forumla to determine the alimony amount.

Another factor affecting the award of alimony is employment status.  Obviously, if the spouse seeking alimony has been unemployed or underemployed for a number of years to care for young children, the home, or the spouse, that is a factor that will militate in that spouse's favor if he or she is seeking alimony.  On the other hand, if that spouse has the ability to obtain employment that will more than adequately meet his or her needs, the court might think a little differently about awarding alimony to that party.  Other factors that are considered closely with this factor include level of education, job experience, the age of children in the household, and work history.

A major factor that can affect an award of alimony is the amount of property to be retained or divided by the parties.  If the spouse seeking alimony has been a stay at home parent, but will have signifcant assets after divorce or has separate assets, like a trust fund, the court's attitude towards the award of alimony will be affected.  The court will certainly view a request for alimony under these circumstances much different than a request made by an individual who is receiving no assets in the divorce or who does not have any separate property.

The health of the party seeking alimony is a major factor that can impact a court's decision in awarding alimony.  If the spouse seeking alimony has a debilitating physical condition that impacts whether or how much they can work, the court will not want to impoverish that party after divorce and the court will be more likely to use alimony to address at least basic living needs.  

One other factor that should be considered by the divorce court and by the parties, is the taxability of the alimony payments.  In most instances, if there is no specific provision to the contrary, spousal support payments are taxable to the recipient and tax deductible to the payor.  The tax benefit obtained by spreading out economic wealth in this fashion can be significant and should be discussed in depth with your divorce attorney.

One issue that is not always considered by the court, but should be discussed with your divorce attorney, is that alimony payments are, in general, not dischargeable in bankruptcy.  If there is any possibility that the party who is to pay alimony will be filing for bankruptcy, the divorce attorneys will negotiate very hard on both sides to maximize the final benefit to their client in divorce.  

It should thus be apparent that in divorce, there can be no easy alimony forumla, no matter what state you live in.  It is impossible to plug these and other factors into a mathematical equation to arrive at a "correct" alimony formula.  It is necessary that the divorce court, or the divorce attorneys review how these varied and different factors affect both parties in the divorce and then arrive at a solution that encompasses all of the divorce issues, including property settlement and alimony.  They cannot simply set up an alimony formula that would work for all parties.

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Relationship and Divorce- Explained better at Lexington divorce attorney

Posted in : Others

(added 9 days ago)

Two people who are in love take wedding vows to stay together for their entire life. However godly affair a marriage may seem to be, some couples do commit the sin of getting divorced. Divorce obliterates them from all the legal customs and responsibilities tying them to the matrimonial bond. So, when staying together becomes an issue for some reason, couples find dissolution of marriage an easy solution.

As marriage involves fulfillment of legal formalities, so does divorce. Though, divorce can be even more stressful due to the complications involved. Various jurisdictions follow a different set of divorce laws which are basically divided into 2 categories - No-fault based and Fault based. Since laws vary from the time of signing in for a divorce to getting it sanctioned from the court, one should be aware of the general procedure of a divorce. There are 7 different types of divorces: No-fault divorce, Fault divorce, Summary divorce, Uncontested divorce, Collaborative divorce, Electronic divorce, Mediated divorce.

Going through with such impediments might seem tough if a divorce attorney isn't there to make available the pre-requisites of getting a divorce. Divorce attorney is a mediator learned in the law and who helps you resolve divorce related issues. What is also essential is your relation with the attorney you hire. In view of the fact that hiring an attorney is an expensive affair, it's important that your money is worth the services you get. There shouldn't be lack of communication and the attorney should be aware of every trivial detail regarding your divorce. While Lexington divorce attorneys and Wellesley divorce attorneys help you with even the complicated cases; Needham divorce attorneys and Newton divorce attorneys also rank among one of the most sought after attorneys of USA; with Weston divorce attorneys ranking among one the topmost when it comes to paperwork.

With escalating divorce rates in America it's a strenuous task to find a lawyer you can rely on for orderly divorce dealings. If you and your spouse is not able to resolve a property issue, its best to get hold of a Lexington divorce attorney. They are up-to-date with the laws regarding the estate settlements. But if it's a matter of child custody then Needham divorce attorneysare sure to be of assistance. Their expertise in this field is sure to get you separated without any trouble. For proceeding with a collaborative divorce where you are alien to all the legal complications required for filing in a divorce, you should go to a Weston divorce attorney. They are equipped with all the general briefing, one requires for divorce. While if your partner doesn't acquiesce with you getting a divorce, a Newton divorce attorney is sure to understand your situation and help you out with it formally and in a stately manner.

Each one of the fore-mentioned attorneys is unswerving in their work and one is certain to get beneficial results. All one needs is to get in touch with a divorce solicitor vis-à-vis your case requirements.

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Parenting After Divorce

Posted in : Effects of Divorce

(added 14 days ago)

Parenting changes after divorce. Often it's harder. In a good marriage -- yes, there are some of those -- parenting is nourished by the sexual intimacy, the pillow talk, the support of the extended families, and the presence of the kids who keep things humming. But it's different after divorce when Mom is frazzled from trying to make it financially, take care of her children, and at the same time, make new friends, and -- with any luck -- find a new partner who can provide some of the sex and excitement she has been missing. It's also different for Dad, who wants to spend time with his children, go to the gym or the ball game and also wants to meet a new woman who will make him feel like he used to feel or wants to feel. And to top it off, the kids are only there part of the time and you have no idea what goes on when they visit the other parent, unless they kindly decide to tell you. It's an altogether different scenario. You don't believe how tired and cranky you are and how short your temper is with the kids, who are just as bewildered as you and just as cranky.

Of course, if you welcomed the divorce and already have a great job that brings you into contact with men and women in your age group and pays well, life can be much more relaxed. Or if you have a committed ex who really helps, or an available Mom or sister who can willingly provide hands-on help, then you are blessed. But if you are feeling overwhelmed like most divorced parents, then you need to take some deep breaths and prepare for a big transition. This is what they don't talk about. Attorneys will tell you about property division, if you happen to still have any. Mediators and counselors will talk about making nice with your ex. But what is most important for your children is to maintain your parenting.

At the start, have a heart-to-heart talk with your children. Tell them that things are going to be pretty confused for a while but that you are trying your best to straighten them out and get the family running smoothly. Tell them you will need their help and they are going to have to be brave so you can help each other.

Then be very specific about what needs to be done and who will do it. Include your own responsibilities. Write it down and hang it in the kitchen. In one scenario, you will look for a place to live. In another, you may need to work some evenings or even weekends. While you look for a new place, the kids need to keep the home neat. There are household chores to be divided, meal preparation and clean up, laundry, feeding the dog, etc. Don't forget to include nights off for mama -- very important. Also include rewards. Plan holidays out with movies and special prizes for everyone. The same advice holds for Dad, especially if joint custody is awarded. Like much of parenting, it's not easy but the rewards are worth it. Eventually it gets easier.

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New divorce law loaded against women: Arun Jaitley

Posted in : Effects of Divorce

(added 15 days ago)

NEW DELHI: A bill seeking to make 'irretrievable breakdown of marriage' as a ground for divorce appeared to be in trouble with MPs from within the ruling side as well as the Opposition attacking the changes.

The Marriage Laws (Amendment) Bill, which was taken up passage in the Rajya Sabha on Monday, was seen to be loaded against women by a significant section of the House. In the face of concerns raised by members, the bill will now be taken up for discussion on Wednesday.

The Marriage Laws (Amendment) Bill seeks to amend the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955, and the Special Marriage Act, 1954, to provide for "irretrievable breakdown of marriage" as a new ground for divorce. It suggests that a divorce on these grounds would be granted provided it doesn't cause 'grave financial hardship' to the wife.

The current amendment takes its cue from the Law Commission's report and two 1985 Supreme Court judgments. It is based on the premise, prevalent across the world, that there is no need to continue with a marriage that has failed.

Leader of the Opposition Arun Jaitley, who agreed that if a marriage is dead, it should be given a burial by a decree of divorce, said the rights of the woman should get absolute protection. He said since the the law doesn't provide for financial backbone for women, they are likely to end up becoming "permanently dependent" on their parents and siblings.

Calling on the government to think through the proposed legislation, Jaitley said that in its current form, "this law may end up creating unusual hardships for women in India."

In India, divorces are conventionally granted on two broad grounds - mutual consent and matrimonial default. The latter, which includes mental and physical cruelty, adultery, desertion, conversion and communicable diseases, allows for the victim to ask for divorce.

"No person can take the benefit of their own default. In that sense, irretrievable breakdown is different from conventional jurisprudence on divorce, in that the person who cause the default can ask for the divorce," Jaitley said.

He stressed those countries which allow for irretrievable breakdown as a ground for divorce have a very strong support system for the wife and children.

"Such divorces become very costly, as property and income is shared with the wife and children. I regret to say that Supreme Court can interpret laws and suggest advancements but elected representatives know the realities better, and without financial backing, women will end up sufferers," BJP leader said.

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Hubby divorces wife in midst of live radio programme

Posted in : Effects of Divorce

(added 16 days ago)

A Saudi man immediately heeded an advice by a prominent Islamic scholar and divorced his wife by telephone during a live radio programme tackling marital issues, a newspaper reported on Saturday.

Hubby divorces wife in midst of live radio programme

The phoned the programme presenter, Sheikh Ghazi Al Shammari, and complained that his wife defied him and travelled to another Saudi city for a company business conference, saying she “offended his manhood.”The unnamed man told Shammari that when they married, he accepted his wife’s demand to work provided this would not interfere with their marital life.

The man said his wife defied him and went straight to the airport in the Western Red Sea port of Jeddah to travel to the capital Riyadh. “He said his wife phoned him from the airport and told him she insists on travelling…he asked Shammari what to do,” Sabq newspaper said.

“Shammari told him to divorce her as a punitive measure for committing such a mistake against her home and husband…the husband quickly agreed and divorced her by telephone during the live programme although Shammari advised him to remarry her if she repents.”

Quoted by Sabq, Shammari said he advised the man to divorce his wife to deter other wives to follow suit, adding that “alien habits” have become widespread in the Saudi society. “Some Saudi women just want to blindly imitate the west by travelling on their own without their husbands, which contravenes Islamic tenets,” said Shammari, whose programme “marital secrets” is aired on MBC radio.

Porn island to be stripped
Bavarian open-air sex enthusiasts whose antics have led to an island in southern Germany to be dubbed “Porno Island” may finally be forced to go inside – the local authorities are stripping the area of its bushes.

The island, in a lake just south of Ulm, has been attracting debauched thrill-seekers since the summer of 2010 – much to the consternation of tourists who flock to the area for its beauty rather than booty.

Now the town authorities in Senden are adopting radical new measures to dissuade unwanted visitors from the town’s famed recreational spot, the Süddeutsche Zeitung newspaper reported on Tuesday. The approaching warmer weather has prompted them to act – before the island is again appropriated by al-fresco lovers.

They are planning to strip the area of trees, bushes and reeds – and remove a gangplank from the waters in an attempt to make the island less attractive. Previous efforts to force ardent nature loves to cool it have been unsuccessful. An initial attempt to end the open-air coupling by putting more police on the beat and undertaking landscaping works in the area failed to deter liberal pleasure-seekers.

The new offensive will cost €5,500, the Süddeutsche Zeitung said, adding that people in the area sick of seeing naked bums on their island, had seldom complained so little about a deforestation project.

Cross-dresser molests female inspector
A Sudanese inspector at Dubai’s municipality who went to a local cosmetic centre as an undercover to check compliance with rules discovered massive violations but was herself a victim of such violations.

When she asked the presumed female specialist to use a laser machine on her to verify her efficiency, she suffered from burns under her shoulder in a painful hair removal process.

The undercover then realised that the specialist is not qualified and is practising laser therapy without licence. But she got the shock of her life when the presumed female worker turned out to be a man.

She quickly phoned the police, who came to the centre and arrested the worker. They also found nearly 100 medical files for unauthorised operations performed by that unqualified specialist.

Emarat Alyoum newspaper said the Filipino, in his 40s, is facing charges of practising medicine without permission, disguising as a woman and molesting a female government official by grabbing her hand and staring at “the upper part of her body for a long time”.

Woman tortures husband’s daughter to death
Saudi police arrested a Pakistani woman for torturing the 10-year-old daughter of her husband to death and beating up the girl’s younger brother with their Pakistani father’s blessing, a newspaper reported on Thursday.

Forensic examination showed the girl had died of a severe blow by a sharp object on the head while her body was full of bruises. Police arrested the woman although her husband denied she killed his daughter by claiming the girl died of fever.

Examination showed the woman was also beating up the boy as there were bruises all over his body and limbs. “The woman was arrested while her husband was also detained for interrogation,” Al Watan newspaper said, quoting Lt Colonel Abdul Mohsen Miman, police spokesman in the western town of Makkah.

The paper quoted the girl’s uncle Shawkat Khan as saying his brother’s wife must be severely punished for what she had done to the two children, who had lived with their father and new wife after the death of their mother. He said he would look after the boy, Radwan, and treat him as a member of the family to “make up for what he had suffered.”

Mum of girls asks for divorce to get boys
A Saudi wife abandoned her husband and asked him to divorce her after she blamed him for having only girls, insisting that she wants a boy.

The unnamed woman in the Kingdom’s eastern region left her home to live with her parents, saying she would stay there until she gets married again and delivers boys. Her parents failed to persuade her to return to her husband.

“All efforts by the two families failed to persuade her to change her mind…she said she insists on divorce because science proved that the sex of the baby is determined by the husband,” Alyoum Arabic language daily said. “She said she would stay at her family’s house until she gets married again and delivers a boy, who will support her when she grows old.”
 
Boy, seven, can die of cold allergy

Aidan Smith of seven years battles his allergy of anything cold. He is constantly at risk of going into anaphylactic shock. And he breaks out in hives if he is touched by anything that is colder than his body temperature.

So he never goes out without a hat, scarf, balaclava and gloves. Aidan can’t go on holiday or eat cold food. And only very rarely is he able to play outside. He is one of just six people in the UK with the condition known as cold urticaria.

He even has problems in warm weather because sweat, designed to cool people down, is colder than his body. Aidan loves swimming but his family can’t find a public pool with water hotter than 17C.

Aidan was diagnosed four years ago when mum Melissa noticed he suffered an allergic reaction from a light breeze. The condition is more commonly found in men aged 18 to 24, and Aidan, of Bispham, Lancs, is the youngest person in the country to have it reports Mirror.

Serial cat killer feared to have claimed 48th victim
It is feared that the recent spate of slayings may be the handiwork of the same person thought to be behind 34 other cat deaths in Somerset in the past few years.

All the cats are understood to have been killed by eating food laced with antifreeze, which causes the animals to suffer a slow and painful death. Telegraph reports that police and animal welfare workers have previously investigated a series of similar cat deaths in Bridgwater and Stogursey, Somerset.

But pet owners and police fear the so-called “cold cat killer” is now targeting the feline population in nearby Taunton where the most recent deaths occurred. All 14 cats have been found dead within one mile of each other in Priorswood, Taunton, in the past month and several more have been reported missing.

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Will divorce ceremonies make parents' split easier on kids?

Posted in : Effects of Divorce

(added 20 days ago)

Will divorce ceremonies make parents' split easier on kids?Ah, weddings. Most of us have, at some point, been invited by friends or family to share in the joy and celebration of a marital union. But have you ever been asked to take part in the end of a marriage?

It could be in your future, as some experts are saying divorce ceremonies are the newest way to help children get through their parents’ break-up, and for adults to take that first positive step toward co-parenting together.

Not to be confused with divorce parties which have been gaining steam for a little while now, divorce ceremonies don’t have a band, buffet or much of a celebratory feeling to them. In fact, they’re pretty solemn affairs— all about letting go of your role as romantic partners but affirming your role as a parental unit.

Dr. Jeffrey Zimmerman, a clinical psychologist and author of The Co-Parenting Survival Guide, has folks write out a series of joint pledges that they say aloud to their kids, and then encourages them to print out and frame their divorce declarations in both of their family homes. “Kids start to hold their parents accountable,” he explained. “They say, ‘Mom, that’s number three! You said you wouldn’t put us in the middle.’”

Teresa Dedovitch, the founder of a website  that plans and provides divorce ceremonies, is also big on including children in the service. “When someone leaves this world, you have a memorial,” she says. “So why not provide validation for this milestone as well?”

Similar to a typical wedding set-up, Dedovitch encourages couples to invite close friends and family members, gives parents an olive branch to hold (instead of a bouquet), and has them publicly recite their divorce vows to one another—with their children standing off to the side (sort of like a bridal party).
While this all might seem a little new age-y, divorce ceremonies have actually been part of the Jewish religion for over a millennium.

Rabbi David Zaslow is putting his own co-parenting spin on the traditional Jewish ritual for his congregation in Ashland, Oregon. He recommends that kids (if they’re old enough and their parents are still being civil to each other) stand in the room and witness the moments when their mother and father formally break their romantic ties.

“Divorce doesn’t have the stigma it used to,” he argues. “It’s time for priests, pastors, sheiks and rabbis to step into reality and help bring closure for families at this time in their lives.”For some, the service can be a life changer. Joann Lane found her own divorce ceremony -- in which she and her ex-husband included their two teenage sons -- so meaningful, she became a certified civil celebrant who now performs divorce ceremonies for other couples with children.

Lane says her sons were touched by their parents’ divorce ceremony. “At some point, I looked over at them, and could see the emotion on their faces,” she said. There’s no question, divorce is hard on a child, under any circumstances. And it’s probably too soon to tell whether divorce ceremonies are really part of the solution or a way for adults to work through emotional stuff for themselves. In the meantime, the next big question: What exactly does one wear to a divorce ceremony?

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How effective is divorce coaching in Collaborative Divorce?

Posted in : Effects of Divorce

(added 23 days ago)

The key purpose of a divorce coaching is to assist clients in constructing a settlement that is satisfactory in nature in an entirely well organized manner and that saves valuable time and money. It facilitates mutual aid and respect effective in enabling a harmless proceeding. Well-being of both the parties and children, if any, is the primary goal in the any divorce coaching.

A divorce coach is an attorney for the requirements of the client who keeps the track of the perspective and needs of the other party and its coach. These coaches share gathered information from their respective clients and attempt to develop an understanding of the whole scenario. They are determined to assist both the sides as a family to arrive at a mutual settlement that proves advantageous to both. Divorce coaching helps the people who plan for a divorce to understand each other's point of view and requirements.

Divorce coaching helps clients to overcome complex thoughts and emotions that prevent clients from agreeing over a agreement. Client's coach works to help them reframe such emotions. As a consequence clients become vulnerable to grasp different outlooks. The whole process is set to inbuilt client's faith on the team and the process which strive its best to embody the client's best self while the painful situation of separation. This way the process is carried out with minimum amount of stress.

In case there are children involved, then divorce coaches work to keep the parents attentive towards their children's wants and the value of working in collaboration for their best interests. Divorce coaching encompasses the whole family and ensures settlement suits every member.

Divorce coaching does not peeps into a client's past life as center of focus but is more inclined towards the present condition and also the future result. For illustration, at times it gets difficult for a client to actually accept the occurrence of the divorce. He or she finds hard to realize it that it is happening for real and experience problems in moving on. Such a client fails to give the required information for the process of divorce and sadly is unable to make a move in order to start a whole new life. Here divorce coaching comes to their rescue. Clients are helped in recognizing this very lack of acceptance, the want to mourn, the need to overcome and need of useful support in doing so. Coaching lays much emphasis on present skills in the arenas of negotiation, parenting, communication and control over self. Clients are also prepared to co-parent their children of the rest their lives. This way the entire process becomes absolutely client oriented.

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(added 23 days ago) / 34 views

Court chaos as hard-up couples try DIY divorce

Posted in : Effects of Divorce

(added 24 days ago)

The biggest shake-up of divorce in a generation is in danger of creating a two-tier system, with wealthier couples benefitting far more than less well-off couples. The warning comes as a survey of more than 6,500 divorce lawyers found that new guidelines, requiring couples to look at mediation as an alternative to using courts, were largely being ignored.

Court chaos as hard-up couples try DIY divorce

The rules came into force a year ago in an attempt to ease pressure on courtrooms by encouraging couples who are splitting up to resolve their disputes.

However, while better-off couples are showing an interest in a new arbitration scheme that allows discreet divorce settlements by specially trained lawyers outside a courtroom, the pressure on family courts is increasing as legal aid cutbacks mean more hard-up couples are representing themselves.

From last April, all divorcing couples were required to attend a "mediation information and assessment meeting" before they could issue an application to the family courts. But the survey by the lawyers' group Resolution found that only one-third of their members were referring most of their clients to such a meeting, while 78% reported that the courts were not checking whether couples had looked at mediation before hearing their application.

While divorce rates rose 4.9% from 2009 to 2010 – just over 11 in every 1,000 married couples will divorce each year in England and Wales – the pressure on courts is intensifying as more cohabiting couples seek legal help in splitting up, while the recession has led more people to represent themselves as opposed to hiring a solicitor.

The Law Society Gazette warns of courts experiencing "a huge increase in litigants fighting their cases themselves" and quoted several judges expressing concern that such cases take twice as long as people who have to be helped to navigate the unfamiliar legal process.

One said: "We are getting more and more people coming to court in private law cases without the benefit of sensible, structured legal advice, wanting to spill blood on the court carpet … The government wants people to stay out of court, but it is very difficult to get people to mediate when they are still very angry and haven't had the benefit of decent legal advice. These cases take an inordinate amount of time, which is having a knock-on effect."

Joanne Edwards of Resolution, a group of family lawyers, said: "The potential for a two-tier justice system here with arbitration for the wealthiest and an over-jammed court system for everyone else is a concern. It's an unprecedented period of change and uncertainty for clients and professionals alike. We have seen a greater awareness of mediation among the public and a huge surge in numbers of lawyers wishing to do mediation training."

She added: "We would also really like to push for a no-fault divorce because, while we have a fault-based divorce system and blame is apportioned, you have a confrontational process which benefits no one."

Part of the divorce law shakeup has also seen some 40 lawyers across the UK just trained to be arbitrators for the new service launched by the Institute of Family Law Arbitrators. The outcomes are legally binding but the process allows people to use a more informal and pliable legal setting to thrash out disputes with an arbitrator of their choice.

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(added 24 days ago) / 31 views